The season of jumping into leaf piles and watching spooky movies is here. Along with that, of course, comes the inevitable return of pumpkin-spice flavored, well…everything. The pumpkin craze is certainly one of the most revered things about fall, but like with everything in life, sometimes it is possible to go too far.
6) Cottage Cheese
Cottage Cheese is gross on its own. It’s basically just spoiled milk whipped up into a lumpy lather of goop. Adding pumpkin to this already stale product is just overkill.
5) Chicken Sausage
We’re not really sure what Nature’s Promise was going for when they released a pumpkin spice flavored chicken sausage back in 2015. If they were trying to win an award for ‘worst pumpkin product in history,’ it’s all theirs.’ Maybe they figured since some people eat both sausage and pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving, if they put the two together they’d have a winner. We don’t know, but we’re pretty sure not one person on earth asked for this.
To be fair, Pringle’s sort of makes its living by rolling out terrible flavored chips. From ‘screamin’ dill pickle’ to ‘loaded baked potato’ Pringles has consistently kneecapped themselves by trying to reinvent the wheel. So in a way, we wouldn’t expect anything less from Pringles.
3) Pasta Sauce
Once again, a classic case of trying just a little too hard. We’re not saying red sauce is the only acceptable topping for pasta, but pumpkin sauce is something that never should have made it all the way to the store shelves. Pumpkin sauce sounds like someone took the pulp from inside a jack-o-lantern they carved and threw it in a blender and put the result into a jar.
Jell-O one of those things you throw in your kid’s lunch box next to their Uncrustable. While lemon-lime, strawberry, and green apple are perfectly fine, having a pumpkin spice Jell-O just ruins the whole point of Jell-O.
Taking the cake for the weirdest pumpkin product ever dreamt up and put into production is Native’s pumpkin spice scented deodorant. Seriously. At least pumpkin chicken-sausage is still a food product. This is truly just too far even by pumpkin spice standards. It’s one thing to want to eat pumpkin spice; it’s a whole other thing to want to smell like one. Who knows, maybe this is one is for that guy out there trying to attract sorority girls by luring them in with the smell. Yea good luck with that.
We can all over do things from time to time, but perhaps nothing has been more exhausted than the pumpkin spice craze. The Starbucks drink is one thing, and who doesn’t love those? Yet once you start making pumpkin spice hygiene products, you know it’s gone too far. What’s next, we don’t even want to know.