We Need You To Weigh In..
In the words of Kurtis Blow, “Don’t you give me all that jive about things you wrote before I was alive/ ‘Cause this ain’t 1823 — ain’t even 1970.” That’s a fact Kurtis. I’m sick of the same lame ass songs from the Oregon Trail days playing through my Bluetooth surround sound. Get with the times, rap is the hottest genre in the world, and it’s time we embrace it while we celebrate the best time of the year.
In this article, I will stack up my personal favorite “traditional” Christmas songs against my favorite hip-hop Christmas songs. I am going to refrain from any “rapping” and “wrapping” double entendres. That shit is played out, like most Christmas songs. Alright, let’s dive in and tell me what you think.
Ayo, Brenda! Pass me some of that pie
“Rocking Around The Christmas Tree” Brenda Lee
“Christmas Rappin’” Kurtis Blow
When Brenda Lee lays out the itinerary for the night and says, “Later we’ll have some f*cking pie,” I rock my jolly ass all around that f*cking Christmas tree. What did that pie do to her? Okay, maybe (MAYBE) she says, “pumpkin,” but I don’t. This song kicks me right in the jingle bells with nostalgia.
I think of the homie Kevin McCallister throwing that fake party that slapped harder than any holiday party I’ve ever been to, that’s facts. That little MF had Michael Jordan there. Home Alone is a top five Christmas movie of all time (fight me), so it’s a no-brainer that this song steps into the ring to defend “traditional” Christmas hits.
Here come the breaks! Nah, for real. If you’re not bumping “Christmas Rappin” this season, then I’m stopping this sleigh right here, buddy. You can mope your way into the New Year. How many times has this beat been sampled? Just off the top of my head, I think of “Too Close” by Next and Queen’s “Another One Bites The Dust.” This track led the way for “Breaks” that became the first rap song to go Gold. How many rappers were influenced by Mr. Blow? Kurtis laid the framework with this song for not just Christmas rap, but hip-hop music as a whole.
Kurtis went in his bag, pulled out a list of bars that was longer than a CVS receipt. He was rapping his ass off with this gift (shit I already did it). I also appreciate the way he describes Santa: “Bout a red-suited dude with a friendly attitude/ And a sleigh full of goodies for the people on the block/ Got a long white beard; maybe he looks kind of weird/ And if you ever see him, he could give you quite a shock.” Cheers to you Kurtis, thanks for blazing the trail.
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